Class of 2022

Yesterday, for the second time in my life, I put on a black gown that hangs down to my shins and a square cap with a tassel that hangs to the right side of my face, and soon after my left side. I walked across a stage, and eagerly grabbed that maroon diploma.

The only thing that was different this time is that the charm on the tassel read "2022", and the matter of the fact that I graduated from college. The University of Minnesota Class of '22.

I don't know if I'm happy, sad, or scared that this part of my life is over.

Maybe all of the above.

I have spent the last four years of my life in dorm rooms, frat yards, libraries, bars, dining halls, study rooms, laboratories, my sorority house, and classrooms. Lots and lots of classrooms.

I spent the last four years finding my best friends, mentors, the love of my life, and most importantly myself. I can't describe how much I have grown as a person.

I am so much more than I was four years ago.

I am more motivated, I am more independent, I am smarter, I am more resilient, and I am going to do amazing things. I am not done learning, and I am not done growing.

I have grown, yes, but throughout my growth I have had a lot of growing pains.

I have struggled. Many times behind closed doors. In solitude.

And I know...

"No one said it was going to be easy".

The pre-med track was and has not been easy, and I have found it to be quite honestly a sick, twisted, and convoluted path that no one can seem to navigate easily. You're lucky if you have an advisor that knows anything about what they're doing, because I sure as hell didn't.

I would like to explain that it has been truly challenging. I don't even mean it in curriculum type of way, either. If you chose to pursue a science, expect competition among your peers instead of cooperation and collaboration, expect your self-esteem to plummet, expect to study until 3am, expect no sleep, expect others to always be better than you. Say goodbye to your social life, say goodbye to spring break trips and fun weekends with your friends, say goodbye to a good grades, and say goodbye to your mental health.

It is draining and it is exhausting.

I will be the first to admit that throughout college I struggled to have a heathy mind at times. I had high highs and very low lows. I beat myself up over and over and over, and pushed myself down. I compared myself and my academic success to everyone around me. I coped with all of that by not eating. By depriving my body of what it needed the most.

There is another aspect of pursuing science and medicine that has made it challenging. And that is the aspect that I felt as if no one seemed to understand what I was going through. Nobody seemed to understand the dedication and time I needed to put in. I'm sorry if that sounds egotistical, narcissistic, or whatever but I don't care. I felt very alone at times because I didn't have anyone going in the same direction I was and am, academically. I didn't and don't have anyone to share my struggles with.

What goes on behind the scenes is an endless list. Studying for the mcat, sucking up to professors to get letters of recommendation, getting into research, and trying to get your name into published research journals. Getting an entry level job in healthcare that pays you shit and exploits you. Making sure you're getting your volunteer hours in, making sure you get that leadership position in that club you're apart of. Oh! and also don't forget to apply to those scholarships, fill out your applications and do well on the two midterms and essay you have in the next day.

Sleep and a clear head? Never heard of it.

I have sacrificed a lot over the last past two years in order to pursue my dream of going to medical school.

I have given up spring break trips that all of my friends go on, weekends with my friends, friendships, going home to see my family, hobbies I enjoy, and time with the people I love.

"Yes" hasn't been in my vocabulary much. And for that I have gotten a lot of "you're so lame" and "you're no fun", etc, etc, and the list goes on. I got used to that pretty quick.

To my parents that's just life and the route I chose, and you know, that may be so, but it still sucked.

So yeah, the past couple of years have been a little difficult.

But I'm proud of myself. I have stuck with this goal for the past 10 years and I will see it through. I am pursuing what a lot of people cannot even think of pursuing, let alone probably would want to pursue. I have been able to continue on this journey because I have had people in my life that have pushed me and believed in me.

This journey looks a lot different for me than it does for a lot of others, and I fully recognize and acknowledge that. For some it's easier and for some it's been harder.

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I have met a lot of amazing people over the last four years and I would like to thank each and every one of you for helping me along the way. Thank you for you courage, your motivation. Thank you for teaching me, for understanding me, and thank you for believing in me.

Tempus Fugit is a latin phrase my grandpa often threw into conversation, meaning "time flies". As a 97 year old who lived a thousand different lives it seems, he was always emphasizing that life is short, and yes, time flies. Be present, have fun, work hard, and live your life to the fullest. Hold those you love closest to you and enjoy the time you have with them.

I fully intend to do all of that.

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If there is any one thing that I have learned from college, is it that I can do difficult things.

I have all the power to go far in life. As do all of you.

So here's to the class of 2022,

Here's to the beginning of our careers,

Here's to changing the world,

Here's to health and wealth,

Here is to life.

Tempus Fugit.

This is only the beginning.